My girlfriend works in the entertainment industry and got this astounding e-mail. Is it real? Probably not, but I’ve worked on enough low-budget/no-budget gigs that it has a hint of truth to the wackiness of this town. Enjoy!

I have a script. It has lots of words that I have spent many years on to ensure it is spelled correctly. The spacing is immaculate and the punctuation is almost entirely correct. We have used some award-winning fonts and it has been printed at the same shop as many academy-award nominated scripts. The story is about this famous guy that does some stuff with some other people. It is an “original” idea based on a book we strongly believed an Oscar winner almost read last summer while on break from filming that movie that has next years “Best Picture” buzz all over it.

We are looking for anyone that might know how to make a movie. We are especially interested in people that either know how to use some sort of camera or have seen someone else use one in the past. I am told we may also require some people that might have some experience pretending to be the people in this very well-formatted script. They would be required to know how to read. Again, this shouldn’t be a problem as the font size in the script is quite large and we tried not to make any of the words too hard to pronounce.

The high profile of this project will ensure that everyone will work for free and bring a pot luck every day. We are hoping to get at least 5 or 6 people on the crew, so the days will be short. I intend to direct this myself as I have seen movies in the past and already have the chair. I also fully intend to have a book on directing available to me before the shoot begins. I do have experience making flip books and doodling on cocktail napkins. I also have a great deal of experience taking direction as people have been telling me where to go most of my adult life.

If this sound like a project you would like to get involved with, I will be taking interviews at Starbucks on Ventura. Please show up between 10:15 and 10:30 as that is when I have my break.